14 July 2010
2:47 PM � JessM � Is Jessica smarter than this picture frame? Tune in next week!
15 July 2010 � Bachelorette Party
11:33 � JessM � Oh crap, I forgot to send this French girl these pictures of kittens�long story
12:37 � Machel � Don�t worry I packed the meat brander
16:51 � Janel � dying babies
Elizabeth � that�s depressing
16:53 � LP � I�m a straight man
16:58 � Cat to LP � Fuck the baby
16:59 � LP � I do love small bows in my ass crack
17:02 � LP � No you can take off your pants and be funny
17:12 � Cat � Don�t be obtuse
17:26 � Renea � I totally went for the sun-kissed cheeks today
17:35 � LP to JessM � Are you holding court?
17:37 � LP � my alcohol to sweat ratio is all out of control right now
17:38 � KT to everybody � Hold your water!
17:41 � Janel � that�s a pretty big crab cake
17:43 � The restaurant staff of the Flying Fish poured bleach down the drain under my chair to try to eliminate the sewage-y smell. Now it just smells like bleachy sewage
17:46 � KT to Bob � are you allergic to shell fish?
17:54 � KT � Janel and I became friends even though I did not want to make any friends
18:00 � Bryony � She also calls me Brian half the time
18:03 � Cat � I�m hiding in the dark, do you want an oyster?
18:06 � KT � Yes! It�s the one ring to rule them all!
18:08 � JessM � How�s your soup?
Renea � It�s very corny
18:09 � Elizabeth � I�m not sure what this is but I am putting it in my mouth anyway
18:26 � Waiter to KT about a fork- NO, the clean ones
18:33 � KT � Can we make sure that no more loud cars drive by?
18:43 � Sewage-y smell gone
18:47 � Cat � It�s actually not a real dragon, just a picture of one
19:04 � JessM � The poop is not my solid waste
19:10 � Sewage smell is back
19:18 � JessM � hold on let me just wipe the jizz off my face
20:59 � Mach � that�s a fat piece of quiche
21:04 � Cat � Jessico!
Machel � JESSICO! I�m just practicing calling in my son
21:08 � Bryony is dying
21:29 � Machel � or get nookie or cancel out other people�s nookie
16 July 2010 � Strip Club
Unknown time: Stripper to everyone � who�s the maid of honor?
Unknown time: JessM meekly walks up to the �Special corner�
Unknown time: Stripper � I�m going to make you a real woman
Unknown time: Katie � Oh my God
Unknown time: Janel � Officially KT�s BFG wedding
Unknown time: Stripper to everybody � I�m going to do the nasty dance for $20
Unknown time: Stripper to Steve � Your going to be straight by the end of the night!
Unknown time: Stripper to Steve � you soooo can be changed
Unknown time: The stripper has removed Steve�s belt
1:44 AM � LP and EJ�s Enya Sing-A-Long
1:49 AM � JessM � Now my face smells like that watermelon stuff
17 July 2010 � Bridal Party Breakfast, Hair, and Make-up
9:57 AM � KT to Mom � You just need to tell them to give you a curly blow out
12:07 � Jessica as Robert E Lee has created a band called �Robert E Lee and the Ladies� with KT and Cat as the Ladies
12:11 � Steve imitating JessM � �I only wear historically accurate sweatshirts�
12:17 � KT � but be careful you might see Michael
Steve � Bichael?
KT � No Michael
Cat � Michael Bichael?
12:15 � Steve � And Katie finds out on her wedding day that her dad is illiterate
12:16 � Steve � we are emaciated shadow versions of men
12:18 � Cat (telling the story of Michael Bichael) � the mom said �And then my son turned into a bicycle� and then the mom was like �oh no now we have to buy a bike lock!�
12:28 � Apparently there is a company in upstate New York called Revenge Crabs and their website is revengecrabs.com. They actually cultivate crabs and you order them and you can sprinkle them where you need to take revenge.
12:30 � Steve � The terminator had to come from the future and destroy my dick
12:34 � Cat � that was like crouching tiger hidden curds
12:56 � Steve � So I just got cheesy waffles?
14:04 � Janel � Is Katie getting blown?
15:17 � JessM � I sweated out my blow out
FIN
